Image from here.

Guys, I made a turd out of myself. On Thursday night, I said “God, I haven’t been sick in a long time.” Then yesterday, I woke up with a cold. I’m feeling a little bit better right now because I threw the kitchen sink at it: DayQuil, ibuprofen, a double dose of vitamin C, breakfast, my daily vitamins, and so many glasses of water. I also tried to nap but that was for naught because the adorable Shirley kept slapping at my head with her sharp T-Rex feet. So, here I am.

I’m trying to figure out what I want my day to be like. Yesterday, I slept for basically the entire day. I don’t want to do that today. I want…something. I don’t know what that is. Right now, it’s sunny and I think that I want to go out and get some sunshine on my face and body before the thunderstorms roll in. This afternoon, we’re supposed to get a shocking storm and no matter what we do, I’d like to be in before that. Perhaps we should just get dressed and go as we are, get a coffee or a chai out-of-doors, do a little bit of yard sale-ing, or go to a craft store, and come the hell home.

What I REALLY want to do is something creative. I want to draw or sew or paint or put stuff I’ve painted up on Redbubble and Society 6. Lately, I keep wanting to get started on things and will not allow myself to. I keep buying things to “help me get started” and then I don’t. Or I’ll buy a book that will “help me get started” and then I don’t. I have a block against getting started for some reason.

The reason, however, may be that I’ve got way too much going on in my life right now. I am flailing around trying to focus on one thing. I read an article today about people like me who have a dangerous combination of optimism and curiosity. We want to do too much. We feel heartbroken that we can’t do everything we want to so it’s hard to focus on one thing that will make us happy because it always has to be at the exclusion of other things. This is me to the letter. I just need to get over myself and stop wasting time. After I typed that, I watched this 20 minute video by Lucy Knisley. Who me? Waste time?

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