XX Judgement

Photo on 1-3-16 at 3.36 PM

We got out of bed SO late today. We had breakfast and watched some of the Mindy show (which we’ve been binging on this New Year’s weekend). Then we decided to put away some of the Christmas and New Year’s decorations. It honestly didn’t make much of a difference because everything is so cluttered anyway. It’s making me crazy. I had planned to get rid of a lot of clutter this weekend but it didn’t pan out. SIGH.

Anyway, I have to go return a lot of things I bought for myself during the Black Friday and Cyber Monday sales; a winter coat, some clothes, etc. They’re all…just not what I wanted. So I’m going to go return them and get some cold hard cash.

That said, I pulled the major arcana card XX Judgement. I’ve pulled this one before and if memory serves “Judgement” isn’t of the doom and gloom “judgey” sort of meaning, it’s of the “use good judgement” meaning. On this card, there is a white bird soaring up out of what looks to be a shadowy nest of branches or other birds. This bird is triumphant and intentional.

The book says “Forgiveness”. “The word “judgement” conjures up fear and guilt in many people. This card, however, concerns itself with another aspect of this word…it’s about seeking truth. No more blaming yourself or others, no more excuses. Now is the time for forgiveness and personal freedom. This card asks you to rise up, let pettiness and fear fall below you. Expand your wings and be reborn. What a relief it will be.”

I can think of a few slight things that this card could mean and I’m already on my way there. In 2015, I spent the first half focusing on myself. In the second half of the year, I spent my time focusing on my job and other people. In 2016, I’d like to have a healthy mix of the three. I have been realizing more and more lately that I have all the tools I need at my disposal to be the exact sort of person I want to be. I literally don’t need anything else. I always tell myself that I do but that’s fallacy. To that end, buying more things has never given me what I need. When I buy things in pursuit of a goal, all I’ve done is buy things. I buy the thing as a step towards getting ready to move but in reality, I wasn’t ready to make a move, I was just ready to buy something to scratch that itch. If I spent more time doing and less time dreaming, I could be getting so much more done. When I put my mind to things, I have been known to accomplish incredible things. The problem is that sometimes I accomplish an incredible thing and it’s, like, too incredible and then I need time to recover from it. I think I need to make my accomplishments less epic (for me) and more small, stable victories. Maybe that’s what I should make 2016 about: small, achievable, tangible, humble, stable victories.

For instance, I’ve really been wanting to re-learn how to cook. That’s simple enough. I’ve been wanting to start exercising on the regular. I have a gym at work, I’m a member of LA Fitness, I have sneakers, a Fitbit and all the workout clothes I need. Walking for a half hour a day should be no problem. I want to write more often. I’ve created an office for myself, I’ve been writing two blogs, I just need to sit down and write the way I want. I want to read more. That’s simple, I got a bunch of books for Christmas, I have a ton of books I haven’t read on my Kindle, and two full shelves of books that I’ve been intending to read but couldn’t because of school.

Those four things: cooking, walking, writing, and reading. I have literally everything I need to improve at these goals in 2016. I can do these things anywhere I am for the most part too. Well, maybe not cooking but still. We’re home often enough that I should be a master chef.

Okay, I have to go get ready to GTFO. The shops are all going to close soon so we probably won’t be able to hit all of them. Really, we may not be able to hit any of them by the time we shower. If so, we’ll just take down the tree and try tomorrow. We’ll see.


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