Day One Hundred and Seventy-five

Yesterday was kind of funny. My boss sent me an email at one point that she was going down to the “Nail Files Truck”. I had ZERO clue what this meant but because I trust that other people know what they’re talking about in regards to their own bidness, I said, “Okay”. Now we have food trucks lined up out back behind our building all day long. Also, I know that there is a reality show called “Nail Files”. Well I didn’t have to wonder for long because my coworker emailed me to tell me I should go downstairs and nose around because the truck was indeed a promotion for the show. “Nail Files” is a reality show about the goings-on of a nail salon in Hollywood that just premiered on the TV Guide Network and we’re all involved in that shiznit. SO, I dragged my (male) coworker down there with me to see what was going on. He had a toe problem he needed to resolve, as it were, so he was game to go and solicit an expert nailswoman’s advice. (Her advice: Get a pedicure every week.) Anyway, I went down there and the star of the show was there sitting at a table. There were goods to be had. Little “Nail Files” nail files, fans, those temporary pedicure flip flops, water, nail decals and a coupla things. They had a truck themed for the show with mani/pedi stations inside. You apparently needed a contest to win a spot but I didn’t know anything about it. My boss implored them to do my nails too (thanks boss!) and so I went in with stern orders on specifically how to get my nails done from the main lady (the star of the show not my boss although she could also be called the main lady in this scenario). The lady who did my nails didn’t work on the salon. She said she was an “independent manicurist” and I don’t think she cared for my written down nail polish instructions much. But she sighed and carried them out. She did make fun of me though when she squirted antibacterial liquid onto my hand and I just stared blankly at her. She did it to her hand and started rubbing it in in like an instructive manner. I was all “Oh”. She was like, “Girl, you the third person who did that today.” And I was all, “Oh sorry, I never get my nails done, I was waiting for orders.” So she did’m up jazzy and I was sent on my way. I was forced to fill out a waiver on an ipad. I asked the girl why and she said that some bitches be crying days after they leave the salon, “Oh they made me bleed!” I was like, “Well I don’t know if I should sign this then. Does hitting count as an injury? The manicurist hit me often.” She said, “Oh girl.” I said, “What about emotional distress? She hurt my feelings on several occasions in there.” She said, “You silly.” And she right. I was being silly.

After that the day went quick. When I went home I ate some of our leftover Indian food from last week (waste not want not y’alls). Then I watched Glee until I ran out of time and had to pick Kristyn up from work. THE MOTHERCRUNKIN ENTRANCE TO THE 10 WAS OPEN!!! (It’s been closed for weeks so this is a victory, EVEN IF they closed my ramp to 405. *sigh*) When we got home, I told Kristyn, “Kristyn, I love Glee so much, I wanna take it out behind the bleachers and get it pregnant.” And then we went to sleep.

OH. Also, regarding yesterday, Kristyn said to me, “Wait you got on a strangers truck at work AGAIN?” I dunno how many of you remember me telling this story but I once allowed myself to be lured onto a truck in Weehawken, NJ near the Hudson River and allowed a stranger man to lock me into leg irons and force me to work out JUST BECAUSE MY BOSS TOLD ME TO. I am nothing if not obedient. I’ll tell this story more in depth later. I ain’t got time for this shit.

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