Yesterday Kristyn had to end her internship because our school back home goofed with her financial aid. Long story short, she can’t do her internship anymore but there’s a potential for some really GREAT things to come of it. Keep your fingers and eyeballs crossed.
Yesterday I cleaned the house all dern day AGAIN. God it’s like those dishes just mulitply in the sink…Then I picked a shell-shocked Krissy up from her internship and took these pictures in commemoration of her last day.
Here’s the Giant Emmy again. We’re both going to win one of these someday, mark my motherfunkin words:
Here’s her profile:
Here’s my boy Micheal Landon. I don’t know why my life revolves ever so subtley around “Little House on the Prairie” but I like it:
Here’s my arch nemesis Walt Disney. Yeah, you know what you did (them’s just jokes don’t sue me):
I *LOVE* that they included Bill Cosby’s Sweater (it needs to be capitalized):
Here’s my friend Jackie Gleason:
Here is the actual head and shoulders of the corpse of Aaron Spelling. (It looks creepier in person, trust a bitch. I wonder what went wrong here.):
Here’s my other friend Johnny Carson. I have a little fun fact about him that actually has nothing to do with him or his life but everything to do with mine or well, my brother’s. On August 29, 1990, I was laying on the living floor with my father, using his arm as a pillow while my sister used his other arm. We were watching Johnny Carson. My mother was in the kitchen, just chillin like a villain. I see her start kind of moving around and think nothing of it. Then she goes, “Charlie! I think you should come in here…” We all run in and there’s water everywhere. She was two weeks beyond nine months pregnant and about to be induced. Her water broke. There was a flurry of excitement and my parents raced off to Clara Maass Hospital in Belleville. I went to sleep on the couch and in the morning, I heard my Great Grandma talking on the phone saying, “Oh it’s a boy?! Oh that’s great!” This was awesome because we’d all been secretly hoping for a boy (some of us more than other bc my father made NOT question of his hope for a boy haha). And that day, August 30, 1990, we got to go visit my Mom and new Brother, wee Charles in the hospital and it was awesome. :*)
(Shoulda named him Johnny though I spose. “HEEEEEEEEEEERE’S JOHNNY!”)
And here’s Mary Tyler Moore! Speaking of Charles (and he’ll kill me for telling this story, sorry Charles, haha), he went through a “Mary Tyler Moore Show” phase when he was a kid. I brought him to Mars 2112 in NYC one afternoon and as we were crossing 51st, he goes, “I wish I had a hat to throw up in the air right now.” I said, “Um, why?” And he said, “Because I feel just like Mary Tyler Moore right now.” Haha…he was 10, give the kid a break. Anyway, this one is for Charles and Kristyn, two big MTM fans.
Angela Lansbury!!! She reminds me of my Grandma Barr. I can’t watch “Murder She Wrote” but I love me some Angela Lansbury nonetheless. Also, she was Bea Arthur’s best bud. If that’s not a qualifier, IDFK wtf is.
These would be my buddies Hanna and Barbera. When I was a kid, I have to confess that I considered them low-rent (like supermarket brand “duplexes” as opposed to Oreos) but this is why I loved them.
And here’s the man, Jim Henson. I wish I could tell you that I didn’t have a crush on Big Bird, Rowlf and Gobo but I can’t. Also, if you wanna make a bitch happy, just sit her in front of some of Miss Piggy’s attitude all day. This may be THE only way to get me to shut up. I also want to say that I always wanted to eat the Doozers buildings and still do.
Here’s Norman Lear. He was a writer and producer on All in the Family, Sanford and Son, One Day at a Time, The Jeffersons, Good Times and Maude. Whaaat?! If I ever met him, I think I’d pass right the hell out. Yet ANOTHER tie to my girl Bea Arthur. What’s not to love?!
Speaking of ties to Bea Arthur, we have my other bestie, Betty Mothacrunkin White up in the hizzy. I am so happy that she’s having a resurgence of fame right now. Homegirl is 88 years old and about to co-host SNL. Ugh, she’s incredible.
WHAT IN THE WHAT NOW?! BEA ARTHUR’S HEAD IS MISSING!!! Oh my god, I almost blew a gasket when I saw this. I said, “Oh, someone’s head is being polished”, looked down and audibly gasped. That’s some bullshit right there is what it is. *Don’t worry, I’ll be back Bea*
When I was walking around the courtyard, I actually got a little teary. This courtyard is for The Academy of Television Arts and Sciences. I ultimately want to get into TV and do EXACTLY what it is that these people are so famous for doing…even if it’s just a small part.
Here’s the other side of the courtyard with the sun setting.
And here’s the building that Kristyn was Interning in:
I had to wait in the car for a while because Kristyn was in a meeting with her superiors. I can’t talk about what happened but it was good. A coupla really great opportunities are falling on Kristyn’s plate because of how well she did at this Internship and I’m so damn proud (and jealous) of her.
When she came outside, she was absolutely shocked and was like, “We gotta get out of here right now because I’m in shock.” I mean she showed up that day with an Internship and was leaving without one but with a bevy of golden opportunities on her plate. She was sad to be leaving the friends she’d made and the work she’d done but amazed that so much good came of it.
So we went home, had a quick (disgusting) dinner and went to do laundry. There’s a 7-11 next door and we went to get a little snackaroo. I found this horrifying-to-behold pastry in there and had to buy it. It made Kristyn downright angry to look at it. It was semi-sweet and kind of a cross between a danish and a croissant. Kristyn took a (very) reluctant nibble and furiously declared it a “disgusting piece of stale evil” or something to that effect. I took a nibble, said, “Eh, not bad” and threw it away so as not to suffer Kristyn’s wrath. We’ve come to find out that this is a Mexican pastry that is much better when it’s fresh and ya know, not from 7-11. I believe it.
After all that drama, we went roller skating for like a half hour at a rink in Glendale. Kristyn did pretty good but I was a mess. I can’t even hold myself the f up. It was adult night and the skaters were incredible to behold. Skate-dancers, people of all ages, colors, personality types, it was amazing. We like staggered out onto the floor, holding onto the wall. We were standing there when a man skated past and told us that inside the rink, you have to keep moving. So we scuttled off the floor and into kind of an eating area. I was going to sit down bc I’m N-O good and Kristyn wanted to still try her hand. The eating area is maybe like 15 feet long, if that. I probably went two feet (holding onto the wall, mind you) before my skates flew out from underneath me. My right arm scraped along the wall, I landed on my duff and sent a table and chairs shooting away from me. A couple was sitting nearby and kind of looked at me and then carried on their conversation. Kristyn here the kerfuffle and came back. I was sitting on the floor willing myself not to cry. God I love falling but not on skates. It’s always so sudden and embarrassing. It’s like a slap in the jowls is what it’s like. BUT I said, “I…WILL…NOT…CRY…” I took of my skates on the spot and wandered over to the seating area, calmer and more composed now. Once Kristyn knew I was okay, she ventured back on the floor and I watched her. She did a great job!!! We talked to the lady who works there and she gave us some info about lessons which we’re going to start taking. I’ve always wanted to skate so I’m really excited! (We both are…)
When we got home, Kristyn gave me some frozen broccoli to put on my arm. I woke up yesterday morning with a gigantic bruise that goes from the inside of my elbow to almost my armpit on my right arm. It’s kinda swollen and it’s hard to put my arm down, haha.
I was on my skates for maybe 15 TOPS. Kristyn goes, “I don’t think anyone noticed.” I said, “Kristyn, so do you think that couple thought a table and chairs shot across the room of its own volition?” She said, “Yeah probably not.”
Oh and although this post is too long as it is, here’s a picture I took last night when I was walking to my car. This is by my Internship, I just thought it was pretty: